Want to Know How to Prepare Third Culture Kid Teens for Adulthood?

Yes! I would love to know how to prepare third culture kid teens for adulthood. Well the expat parents living in the Netherlands have a great opportunity coming up. There are two workshops coming up this week on this topic. Ellen from Sea Change Mentoring is visiting the Netherlands and she will be conducting this workshop. I interviewed Ellen recently about her new mentoring program for expat teens. It's worth reading the interview.

The first workshop is Monday 11th March 2013 from 18.00 to 19.30 hrs in the American Book Center Treehouse in Amsterdam. You can register here.

The second workshop is on Tuesday 12th March 2013 18.00hrs to 19.30 hrs at the American school in Wassenaar. More information is available here.

During the workshop participants will:

• Learn the specific challenges and successes TCKs experience when transitioning to their passport culture, university and young adulthood
• Learn what reverse culture shock is and how TCK teens and young adults experience this
• Learn strategies to minimize the harmful symptoms of reverse culture shock
• Learn what skills and characteristics are specific to TCKs and how teens and young adults can make the most of these
• Learn how mentoring is an effective solution to helping TCKs through this transition and how Sea Change Mentoring works
• Network with other participants to help strengthen a supportive community around these matters
• Connect with a number of related resources 
  
  

Ellen says: "I grew up as a TCK in Japan and Singapore and know firsthand what the benefits are of living abroad and what the risks can be of going “home.” According to the research that’s out there and our own survey results, the majority of TCK’s want (or wished they had) someone from the expat community to guide them through the process of adjusting to their home country. Mentoring is focused on letting the power of a structured relationship with a caring and safe adult be a guiding force in helping a young person live a well adjusted life. In my opinion, mentoring is perfectly suited to help young people living abroad." 

I hope to attend one of the workshops and I am willing make notes and share what I learn. What do you want to know? What's your experience? Do you have advice for other parents?

Related Posts:
Book review of the book Expat Teens Talk
The Most difficult transition for third culture kids  
A Third Culture Kid's Guide to college (DenizenMag)
Culture Shock: What Your Kids can't Tell You (Anne Gillme)
Third Culture Kid Book Project by Jessica Wen

Photo by Anita Peppers MorgueFile.

May You Have a Rich Multicultural Year in 2013

I'm dreaming of ice skating: photo by DrieCulturen

I really wanted to write a Christmas wish this year but before I knew it I was too late. So before new year's eve hits us I want to wish you all a rich multicultural year wherever you are at the moment and wherever you will be going in the year ahead.

Thank you for reading this post. Thank you to everyone I have connected with this past year through this blog, twitter or facebook. I enjoy life a little more through all the new encounters. As a way of expressing my gratefulness there's a giveaway available here on this blog. If you are interested in winning a free signed copy of Maggie Mykleburst's book "Fly Away Home" leave a comment before the 31st of December 2012.

Looking back over 2012 here are 10 things I am excited about:

1. Connecting with so many interesting people this year.
2. A new book that was published "Expat Teens Talk" by Lisa Pittman and Diana Smit. Here's my book review.
3. A new mentoring program for expat teens that has been started called Sea Change Mentoring. Here's an interview I had with Ellen, the initiator.
4. Discovering a great third culture kid poem: "Who Am I?" written by Marina Sofia.
5. In honour of my blog's first anniversary that TCK author Heidi Sand-Hart agreed to an interview and to give away a signed copy of her book "Home Keeps Moving". If you missed the interview do read it.
6. I was on the radio on two different occasions this year talking about my experience growing up abroad as a third culture kid. Here is the interview on DeGids.fm "Een DrieCulturen kind voelt zich eigenlijk nergens thuis. Here is the interview on Expat Radio "Niet weten waar je thuishoort, je bent wellicht een TCK!" Both are in Dutch.
7. The blog post with third culture kid Victoria saying "I am not from Anywhere" received the most comments this year.
8. This blog was nominated for a couple of awards: The Versatile blogger award, Blog Expat Top Award , I'm not a tourist expat blog competition.
9. I really liked this guest blog by Libby Stephens "Grandparenting over the seas".
10. Daily there are people from more than 10 different countries in the world reading blog posts here. The last 24 hours people from the USA, the Netherlands, Russia, the UK, Israel, New Zealand, Germany, France, India and Austria were here. It's a small world after all! It's exciting.

I need to share something funny. The top search word that people search for and reach my blog is the word "tjendol". I was really surprised. In this post I shared 7 things about myself. This is what I wrote: one of my favourite drinks is: Tjendol (or Cendol), in good Indonesian restaurants you can get it here in the Netherlands. It's just divine. It's with coconut milk and palm sugar. Lesson learned: you're never too old to taste something new. I thought the top search word might be "expat" or "third culture kids" but no "tjendol" is the word that won this year. Sometimes things just work out differently than you expected.

Looking back are there things that you are excited about? What are you grateful for?

Ps. remember to leave a comment and have a chance at winning a free signed copy of Maggie's book.

Here's some advice from Maggie for third culture kids: "Although I think it's great to consider yourself a citizen of the world, I still think its important to know where you come from. To feel a sense of pride and belonging to your passport country."

Related Posts:

• Christmas the Third Culture Kid Way by Unsettled TCK Cecilia Haynes
• An Expat's Letter to Santa by MaDonna Maurer at Raising TCKs
• Christmas Around the World
• For the Third Culture Kid birthday candles are easier to come by than the Christmas kind by the Displaced Nation

Book review of the book "Expat Alien" by Kathleen Gamble

I am so happy that there are third culture kids out there writing books and telling us their story. Kathy Gamble not only grew up abroad but also followed suit. She married a Russian American, moved to Moscow and raised their son there. As an expat parent she raised their cross-cultural kid in Russia.

I met Kathy online through her blog Expat Alien. She has written her memoir "Expat Alien, My Global Adventures".

Her parents moved to Burma in the 1950's and that's where Kathy was born. Due to her father's job in Third World agriculture with the Ford Foundation the family moved to Mexico, Colombia and then to Nigeria. At thirteen years of age she goes to boarding school in Switzerland. She likes the school better than the one she attended in Texas for a while. In Switzerland "I felt like I could breathe" she writes. Kathy describes life at boarding school. The food was generally bad and you did not get to choose who you lived with.

While she was at boarding school in Europe she travelled the continent from Venice, Florence in Italy to Paris and London. She learned to ski in St Moritz. Actually wherever she was she travelled. "I used to run into people I knew a lot in airports and museums around the world".

The book gives insight into the life of a third culture kid. Kathy survived a plane crash, an earthquake and a military coup but to her her life was normal. It was only when she moved to California to start college that she discovered that the other girls didn't like her stories of her life abroad. They thought she was bragging or lying. Her first year was very difficult, she suffered from a "reverse" culture shock. I can really identify with this part of the book because my experience was very similar to Kathy's. I went to university in the Netherlands but had a similar experience. Kathy starts to wonder whether there is something wrong with her. During the years in America she never got over the feeling that she was different.

While living in Moscow, in her forties she discovers what global nomads are and that they are also called third culture kids. It was her "aha" moment, this was what she had been looking for. She says that she is not from anywhere. She is a third culture kid, from everywhere and nowhere.

The book is a great read for anyone who grew up globally or parents who are raising third culture kids. If you just enjoy travel and adventure stories then I am sure the book will appeal to you too.

Related Posts:
Interview with author Heidi Sand-Hart of "Home Keeps Moving"
Book review of Expat Teens Talk
New mentoring Program for Expat Teens
Book review of the Globalisation of Love by Wendy Williams

Book review of the new book "Expat Teens Talk"

The book Expat Teens Talk has just been published and it is written by Lisa Pittman, a practicing psychologist and Diana Smit an educational therapist. It is forwarded by Ruth van Reken, co-author of the famous book "Third Culture kids, Growing up Among Worlds".

The power of the book is that it gives expat teens a voice.

"Being an expat teen is bittersweet; You're exposed to so many amazing people and places, but there are very few others who really understand what you have experienced".

"Moving around the world helps me to appreciate all the different cultures of the people I meet". 

"I find it difficult to constantly say goodbye"

The book is written for the teens, their parents and for professionals (teachers, therapists, doctors) too. As far as I know there is no book like this one available on this topic. The teenage years are considered to be the most challenging time in one's life and if during this time international moves are made it can be a confusing and difficult time. If the teenagers struggle it usually affects the whole family.

In the first part of the book there is advice from peers, parents and professionals on each subject. At the end of each chapter there is the possibility to write down personal reflections. The youngsters that give advice have been there and they know what other teenagers who move internationally go through. Being an expat teen you can often feel "the odd one out" (I know all about it), you think you're the only one not knowing how to behave (sticking out like a sore thumb), how to dress for a certain occasion or how to act. The great thing about this new book is that expat teens discover that they are not the only ones going through these transitions. They are not the only ones experiencing all these confusing emotions. That "aha" moment can help heal the pain of the teen's heart.

These subjects are tackled: the challenges of moving, sex, drugs and alcohol, stress and worry about school grades, and what happens after expat teen life. This is a down to earth, practical book. The authors have chosen to use the word "expat teens" but these teenagers can also be called third culture kids. I would have liked to see more internet links in the book. I think our expat teens are on the internet a great deal of the time and it would have added value to this book if there would have been more suggestions on where to find information on the internet. I wish this book had existed when I made my transitions during by teenage years.

If you are interested in reading more, you can read an interview with the authors of the book "Expat Teens Talk".
Find "Expat Teens Talk" on twitter @Expatteenstalk
Expat Teens Talk blog
Are you a teen and do you want to talk about your expat experience? You can fill a questionnaire in here. Number of pages: 183 pages
Published by Summertime Publishing

Related posts:

It can be lonely

• Teenagers the sky is the limit
• New book: Emotional Resilience and the expat child
• Top 10 countries for raising children abroad
• Third culture kids going to university 
• Cultural identity confusion and third culture kids

Image by Gladtobeout Morgue file

Teenagers: the sky is the limit?

Wow! It's amazing, these two 17-year-olds from Toronto, Canada managed to launch a lego man 24 kilometers into the stratosphere. The whole enterprise cost them less than $500. They used a weather balloon, some cameras, determination, creativity and a certain mind set. They were thinking "out of the box". Well it certainly gave them "different" view of the world. A nice inspiring story.

You know third culture kid teens or expat teens are a little like these boys. They are often creative, can be determined and think out of the box. So what is it actually like to relocate across the globe with teens and how many kids are there out there making international moves. It's really hard to find the amount of kids moving. I did find some figures about the number of kids attending international schools.

At the moment there are more than 6000 English speaking international schools in the world. In 236 countries of the world (click here if you want to know in which countries) you can find an international school. There are 2.979.680 students attending these schools. Source: www.iscresearch.com. Most of the students attending these schools will be third culture kids or cross culture kids.

Here in the Netherlands there are 12.500 students attending international schools. Source Factsheet JGZ

4 tips when relocating internationally with teenagers:

1. The best time to move is at the beginning of the school year because that's when the groups are forming.
2. Include your teenagers in the preparation of the move. Take them with you to see the new country. Allow them to be part of choosing the new home and school etc.
3. Acknowledge their emotions. Maybe they are angry about the move or sad.
4. Consider taking the family pet along. Our dog made an overland move when we moved from Malawi to Zimbabwe. My dad drove our car from the one country to the next and took our dog along too. He had company on the road and we had our pet in our new home.

Do you want to read more about moving with teenagers? Check out www.Internationalfamilytransitions.com

This week I found an interesting blog: Expat Teens Talk. It's worth a visit. The blog gives insight into the life of an expat teen. Here is an example of a blog post: The positive aspects of being an expat teen. You know these teenagers are all over the globe even the sky is not the limit.

Do you have any tips when relocating with teenagers? I would love to hear them.

Related posts:

• Global Nomads on the Move
• Global Nomads on the Move part 2
• Third culture kids learning to be themselves
• Third culture kids going to university
• Children of the World: Where are your roots?

Image thanks to Taliesin Morguefile